Friday, September 10, 2004

It's Just a Little Crush Not Like I Faint Every Time We Touch
It's just some little thing, not like everything I do depends on you*

And so it begins, my aforementioned long post in the works. I'm going to investigate a topic I don't think I usually deal with here on P.R.E.-- relationships-- like, the guy/girl kind-- more specifically, my own and in plain, black and white terms. Hmm, I wonder if I can actually write an entire serious post without metaphors or allusions... probably not. We'll see.

Consider this Part I.

Today's vocabulary (sponsored by

Crush n:
  • A usually temporary infatuation.

  • One who is the object of such an infatuation.

  • Infatuation n:
  • A foolish, unreasoning, or extravagant passion or attraction.

  • An object of extravagant, short-lived passion.

  • Attraction n:
  • The power or act of alluring, drawing to, inviting.

  • Admiration n:
  • Wonder mingled with approbation or delight.

  • An emotion excited by a person or thing possessed of wonderful or high excellence.

  • Crush v:
  • To squeeze, so as to destroy the natural shape or integrity of the parts

  • Humiliate or depress completely

  • Make ineffective

  • The noun "crush" and I have long been near and dear bedfellows. Over the years, I have fallen into many a silly schoolgirl crush. I find crushes fun because you never know when they'll hit, or why. I have crushed on boys because of their musical talents, their beliefs, their writings, their wit, their humor, their compassion, their overall style and let's face it, just because they're cute. However, I've noticed the sources of my crushes delve much deeper than I at first believed. Don't get me wrong, an amazing smile and sparkling eyes can still bring home the jitters, but I've realized that there's more to it than that.

    You see I've found that what intrigues me more than those pearly whites and glimmering blues is what makes them surface in the first place. In other words, I become attracted to a boy, not necessarily with the defined "extravagant passion" but because he is extravagantly impassioned. The true foundation for my crush is not the characteristics displayed but the ideology behind them. Something in their writing, wit or style exudes a quality that, whether I understand it or not, I respect. Take "A" for example: a political science major I liked a bit my freshman year of college. Whereas I could have cared less about politics at that time, I sat and listen to him talk at length about governing issues simply because I was so entranced by his fervor for the political sphere. However, no matter how zealous he was about politics, without having more in common, the frequency and quality of our conversations ebbed away, along with the passion-induced sparkle and gleam that allured me in the first place.

    Hence, we get to the "temporary" aspect of a crush, because for something to truly be a crush, it must be temporary.

    You see, crushes tend to occur on people whom we know very little-- which is the basis for my theory on "New Girl/New Boy Syndrome" in which the new kid on the block gets more attention than others because she/he is fresh, uncharted territory and imaginably (though on the average, improbably) one's perfect match. Since you hardly know this person, he/she has yet to fall short of your figmented mate. Until you truly get to know him/her, the new kid gives flesh to your ideal.

    Since crushes are then, by definition, temporary they're only "good" until the new car smell wears off, after that, it must ebb into either admiration or the abyss. Maybe that's why I like crushes; they allow you to investigate, to dip a toe in the water. In the long run, little crushes (n) act as buffers from big crushes (v). But that's another post for another day.

    *Titling format inspired by Dave.